There are specific things that come to mind when people think of sexy bedroom additions, like a vibrator, restraints, or lingerie. Then there are unexpected items that might not immediately come to mind, but that really deserve more celebration. A sex pillow is at the top of that list.
Maybe you’re looking to explore exciting new sex positions, and have no idea where to start, or maybe height differences create awkward situations for you and your partner. Sex pillows can help you unlock a whole new world of pleasure.
I'm willing to bet that just about everyone who has sex has run into some situation when their body wouldn't get into the position they wanted. Let me tell you, sex pillows are the easy solution for your sex position issues.
What is a sex pillow?
The obvious answer is the right answer: They are simply pillows designed to support you in different sexual positions. Generally, they are firm foam pillows of varying sizes, shaped at angles that keep your body aligned and supported during sex. Just changing your body’s position can be enough to transform your average orgasm into something more intense.
Sex pillows are way better at lifting your hips for side-of-the-bed sex, boosting your butt for backdoor sex, or elevating your pelvis for a hot makeout than a regular pillow could ever be. Since sex pillows are made with high-density foam, it means that they're much more supportive than a pillow you’d use for sleeping. You can use sex pillows if you have to kneel on the bed or the floor, when you’re giving your partner oral sex, for example. Sex pillows are also helpful for moving playtime outside the bedroom and into other locations.
Can you use a regular pillow as a sex pillow?
If you don’t want to invest in a sex pillow just yet, experiment a little with your regular pillows first. Figure out where they come in handy, and where they might get in the way, before picking out a specific pillow for your bedroom. Just remember to change the cover before you put your head on it to go to sleep!
Keep in mind: Typically, pillows for sleeping are too soft to support your body weight, so you could also opt for an inexpensive inflatable sex pillow to start out.
Why use a sex pillow?
Use a sex pillow if you and your partner are very different heights and you need a way to make your hips line up with theirs, if you have a bigger body, if the mattress feels too soft for good thrusting, or in any other scenario where you feel a pillow might help. Great sex is all about angles, and sometimes it's just hard to find the angles that best hit the G/P spot, result in an orgasm, or even feel comfortable.
Are there any downsides to using a sex pillow? The only “negative” aspect I can even think of is having to clean it, which you should be doing with all your pillows, anyway!
Benefits of using a sex pillow:
- Support and added comfort for body parts such as the hips, knees, or back, which is particularly helpful for those with chronic pain, joint issues, sports injuries, or other ailments
- Allows for deeper penetration for those who have smaller penises
- Prevents larger penises from slipping out
- Helps couples with height differences to align their hips
- Useful for plus-size individuals
- Makes it easy to get into more adventurous sex positions
- Non-scary introduction to sex toys and other intimacy products
How do you use a sex pillow?
- Place the Wedge under the receiver’s lower back for better missionary, more access to the G/P spot, deeper penetration, and more comfortable oral sex access
- Using the Wedge or Jaz as a cushion for one’s hips, doggy style or anal sex becomes more comfortable
- Lean back on a Wedge, using the thicker part as a headrest, or on a Humphrey for a laid-back and reclined masturbation experience
- The Wedge or Jaz can also be used for rider-on-top positions—the person doing the riding can prop a pillow under both their knees for comfort and more leverage, or a pillow can go under the person being ridden for a better angle
- Mount your favorite vibrator or dildo in Humphrey or the BonBon and ride it
- For any positions where one person’s legs are up (like the legs-on-shoulders position), adding a Wedge, Humphrey, or Jaz underneath the legs-up partner's hips can ease their lower back
The bottom line is: Sex is supposed to feel good, and if it doesn't, an easy change is to adjust your position. Don't be afraid to stop, let your partner know what’s going on, and move your bodies. Sometimes even the smallest adjustment can make a big difference in the amount of pleasure you and your partner both feel during penetration. Try different pillow shapes and positions to figure out what works best.
Carly S. (@Makeupandsin on all social media) is the Queen of Wands, a pleasure educator, a porn star, a model, the blogger of Dildo or Dildont, and a bad bitch from the Bronx. She’s managed and been the featured educator of some of NYC’s award-winning sex toy stores. You may have seen her teach at Exxxotica, Cycles and Sex, Sex Expo, or 420 Expo; read her work in Cosmopolitan, Glamour, or Shape; or heard her on countless podcasts.
This post was written by a guest blogger, and all opinions and ideas expressed are that of the author. All ideas included are for educational and entertainment value, and do not constitute medical advice.